Life seems so full of things that no one wants to talk about.  Little Secrets that all of us deal with, but few acknowledge.  This Summer, we talk...

We struggle, we fight, we hide...it's time to come into the light and allow God and our Church family to wrap their arms around us and help in our struggles.  And that begins here.  In the coming weeks, check back for answers about sins, struggles, and fears.  Have a question of your own? A prayer request or confession?  Email it to Michael at michael.chambers@tcmax.net or place it in the Unmentionables box in the TNT Youth Room.  It's time to talk.

What is sin?

Suicide

Pornography

Homosexuality

Racism

Idolatry

Purity

Self-Injury

According to Websters1828 Dictionary:

Sin
SIN, n.

1. The voluntary departure of a moral agent from a known rule of rectitude or duty, prescribed by God; any voluntary transgression of the divine law, or violation of a divine command; a wicked act; iniquity. Sin is either a positive act in which a known divine law is violated, or it is the voluntary neglect to obey a positive divine command, or a rule of duty clearly implied in such command. Sin comprehends not action only, but neglect of known duty, all evil thoughts purposes, words and desires, whatever is contrary to God's commands or law.

In other words, sin is anything we say, think, or do that goes against or fails to obey the standards for living that God has revealed to us in His Word the Bible. But having a definition is only the a beginning.  It's important for us to understand why sin is such a big deal.

Everyone has sinned (Romans 3:23), and the result of that sin is death, or eternal separation from God (Romans 6:23).  The cool thing is that God loved each and every one of us so much that He sent His only begotten Son Jesus to die on the cross and take the punishment for our sins (John 3:16, Romans 5:8, 2 Corinthians 5:21) and then give us the gift of living eternally with Him in heaven (Romans 6:23).  And the only thing we need do to receive this gift of forgiveness and eternal life is to believe on Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior (Romans 10:9, Ephesians 2:8-9). 

But salvation doesn't end with just the promise of eternity and the forgiveness of sins, but rather those are only the beginning.  God also has plans for our life in the here and now to be full of love, purpose, and fellowship with Him (Ephesians 2:10, 1 John 1:1-3). 

That's where our unmentionable sins and hurts make such a difference.  When we allow sin and hurt to mess with our relationships with each other and God (1 John 1: 5-6), our life begins to feel incomplete, disjointed, and even empty.  But there is hope.  When we confront, confess, and deal with our sins, our relationships can be renewed (1 John 1: 7-9).

It's time to talk.  It's time to deal with our hidden sins and hurts and allow God to touch our lives in a new and vibrant way. 

Made for Life: God created us all to live, to enjoy life and live in fellowship with Him.

Genesis 2:7; Psalm 139:13-17; John 10:10; 1 John 4:9

Too often we get overwhelmed by what's going on in our lives.  Feeling as though no one cares, that life has no meaning, and that maybe the world would be better off without us, some of us begin to consider suicide as an alternative.  If you or someone you  love is considering suicide, then it is vitally important to choose to live and begin to make some discoveries in your life.

Life is often painful, but it can get better.

    Even Godly people like King David struggled with the troubles that life seemed to throw at him.  Messed up relationships, disappointments, failures, and even depression are par for the course, even for Christians.  (Psalm 23)  

Every problem has a solution other than Suicide.

     

Your absence will not make others lives better.

     Too many times, people think that if they weren't around, then others wouldn't be disappointed, hurt, or bothered any more. The truth is, that many times when broken, hurt, tainted relationships end with the death of someone in that relationship, it causes even greater pain and regret.  You were created to make an impact on this world (Ephesians 2:10), and taking yourself from others will not solve their problems or yours.

So What Do I Do?

Share your pain.

  Even when we feel alone and unloved, there are people around who want to help.  We must be bold enough to make the choice to share our pain instead of using suicide as a solution to it.

You are loved.

  There are people all throughout this youth group and this church who love you deeply.  You don't need to be alone any longer or feel like you don't matter.  You do. (Romans 8:38-39)

Get help.

  If you or a friend or loved one are struggling with Suicidal thoughts, it is very important to seek help from someone who can help you work through feelings and find solutions.  Below are some great resources for you to check out.

National Suicide Prevention Hotline
1-800-273-TALK

An anonymous hotline for you to find help for yourself, a friend, or a loved one.  The first response for suicide is to seek help immediately!

www.stopasuicide.org

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Eating Disorders like Anorexia and Bulimia and habits like Cutting are forms of self-injury that can lock us into lifestyles of doubt, fear, and shame.

It is important to realize that many of us struggle with issues of control and numbness to life, and sometimes we might choose to act out on these in the form of Self-injury

Eating Disorders:

Anorexia Nervosa - refusing to maintain a normal body weight for your height

Bulimia - Eating normally and maintaining a normal body weight, but going through cycles of binging and then purging/fasting/or exercising excessively.

Sometimes eating disorders are based in body image issues, sometimes they are a control issue.

Cutting:

Cutting is sometimes about emotional release, sometimes about control or feeling alive.

Ending the Cycle:

• Be willing to acknowledge your struggle - Talk to a youth leader, parent, friend and ask them to help you overcome your problem and find answers
• Discover what triggers your self-injury cycle. - Most of the times, feelings that lead to self-injury arise from a common issue, relationship, or interaction.  Find out what it is and then work to change it in.
• Create healthy releases
  • Journaling, art, music
  • Public Service

For immediate help call 1-800-A-Family and ask for the counseling department.  Share with them your struggles and be willing to seek help.

Find help for Cutting and Eating Disorders from Focus on the Family  

       Answers and Help on Eating Disorders

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noun

creative activity (writing or pictures or films etc.) of no literary or artistic value other than to stimulate sexual desire

Most all of us know what pornography is, we're surrounded by it.  From ads for drinks to pop-ups on the internet, we all encounter it on a regular basis.  In fact:

• 8-16 year olds having viewed porn online - 90% (most while doing homework).
  
• U.S. adults who regularly visit Internet pornography websites-40 million
• Christians who said pornography is a major problem in the home-47%
  
• Breakdown of male/female visitors to pornography sites is 72% male & 28% female
  
• Internet Pornography Sales-$4.9 billion
  
• Pornographic websites-4.2 million (12% of total websites)
  
• Pornographic pages-420 million
  
• Daily pornographic search engine requests-68 million (25% of total search engine requests)
  
• Daily pornographic e-mails-2.5 billion (8% of total emails)
  
• Internet users who view porn-42.7%
• 89% of porn is created in the U.S.
• $2.84 billion in revenue was generated from U.S. porn sites in 2006
• Over $3k a second is spent on porn worldwide.
  
• 72% of porn viewers are men.
• 260 new porn sites go online daily.

Source: internet-filter-review.toptenreviews.com

.

So if pornography is so prevalent, and so many people seem to accept it, why is it such a big deal if I "enjoy" it every once in a while? 

"Never commit adultery."
- God (Exodus 20:14 God's Word Translation)

"You have heard that it was said, 'Never commit adultery.'

But I can guarantee that whoever looks with lust at a woman has already committed adultery in his heart."
- Jesus (Matthew 5:27-28 God's Word Translation)

What Jesus does in the Sermon on the Mount is to make adultery more than just a physical act.  He teaches that what we look at, read, and think about (both men and women) are important.  So pornography becomes a sin issue because when we look, read, or watch, we are committing adultery in our mind.

The problem with pornography is that it's not just any sin.  It is a sin that drives us deep into ourselves, isolates us from others, and teaches us to treat people made in the image of God as objects meant to serve our desires.  Often times the guilt, shame, and hiding force us into a cycle of depression and regret.  Pornography can become a thing that severs our relationship with others and God, and makes it difficult for us to view members of the opposite gender as anything more than sex objects.

If you are struggling with pornography, you are not alone.  And there is hope!  Here are a few things you can do to help overcome pornography:

• Confess your struggle to someone you can trust - Not just a buddy who also likes porn, but someone you know will be willing to ask you if you have stayed away from it.
• Avoid the situations that lead to you partaking in pornography - Maybe it's too much time on the internet, too much t.v., or just choosing the wrong books and movies.  Whatever it is, set up barriers for yourself to help avoid those situations.  Not only that, but have a plan of action for when you are tempted to give in:  call a friend and talk about your struggle, read your Bible, go hang out with your Mom or Dad (that'll kill any thoughts of sexual stuff), just do something that moves you away from the situation. If internet pornography is your biggest struggle, consider installing an accountability or filtering program of some sort.  Here are a couple of options:

Accountability Software      Internet Filtering Software

• Don't give up on yourself!  If you find that you are struggling and unable to overcome pornography do matter what you do, it's definitely time to seek outside help and consider a program for pornography addiction.  There are a couple free, web based programs available at places like www.settingcaptivesfree.com

If you need help, or just someone to talk to, please feel free to contact me at michael.chambers@tcmax.net

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of or characterized by sexual desire for those of the same sex as oneself

Homosexuality is most likely one of the most controversial and difficult topics that we can address in the current church culture.  Because of that, most of us are more likely to make jokes, respond in hatred, embrace it in the name of tolerance, or just ignore the issue altogether instead of taking the time to find out what God's Word the Bible really has to say about it. 

So, let's start at the very beginning.  Sometimes the best way to understand how we should look at something today is to discover what it's original intent or design was.  When we take a peek at the very first mention of human sexuality in the Bible (Genesis 1: 27-28,Genesis 2:24) we discover that God originally created man and woman to be together for the purpose of procreation (that's making babies).  Sexuality was designed by God to be between one man and one woman for a lifetime with one of the goals of that relationship being "fruitfulness."

As people began to go against God and do things that go against His plans and purposes (Romans 1:26-27), they began to express sexuality outside of the way that God had designed it for us.  And so, homosexuality was born. It's kinda like using a screwdriver to open a can of soup; it'll work, but it's not really made for that.

So, now that we know the background, it's time to get to the heart of the matter. 

Some Biblical facts about homosexuality:

• First and possibly foremost, contrary to cultural belief, it is a sin. Check out what God has to say in the following:

When a man has sexual intercourse with another man as with a woman, both men are doing something disgusting and must be put to death. They deserve to die.  (Leviticus 20:13 God's Word Translation)

Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.
(1 Corinthians 6:9-10 English Standard Version)

• Second, homosexuality is no worse or better than any other sin.  While any sexual sin has a deeply personal nature to it  and has a tendency to draw extreme reactions from people, it's important to understand that sin is sin.  Take a look at the verse from 1 Corinthians again.  No really, take a look. In it you will find a list of lifestyle sins including the greedy, drunk, and thieving as well as homosexuality. In Galatians 5:16-21, we find another listing of lifestyle choices that separate us from God, among which is sexual immorality (within which category homosexuality fits, as well as sex before marriage, adultery, etc.).  Also in this list are other sins like jealousy, anger, and envy.  As we look at these two lists, sins that we think of as "small" or "insignificant" are right alongside homosexuality.  If you find yourself or someone you love struggling with homosexuality, you are not alone in your struggle with sin.  Some may try and tell you that your sin struggle is extra bad or evil, but all sin separates from God.  Homosexuality is simply another struggle, though it is deeply personal and deeply controversial in some Christian communities.

• Third, if you struggle with homosexual sin tendencies, you can overcome them.  The last part of that passage in 1 Corinthians says:

That's what some of you were! But you have been washed and made holy, and you have received God's approval in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of our God.
(1 Corinthians 6:11 God's Word)

That means that all of those sin issues listed in the 2 verses prior are beatable.  You and I no longer have to be ruled by our hidden sins like adultery, stealing, homosexuality, etc.

If you are struggling with homosexuality, you can overcome, and there are resources available. 

1. There are lots of loving adults here at TNT that would love to talk with you, pray for you, and encourage you in your struggle with your own hidden sins or the sins of someone you love.
2. There are some resources on the internet that can help you out.  If you are struggling with homosexuality or with someone else's homosexuality, consider checking out the following sights:

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–noun

Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1)
Based on the Random House Unabridged Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2006.

What do you call a person who looks down on others simply because of the color of their skin, the accent of their speech, or the faith that they profess?  Ninetimes out of ten you call that person a racist.  The other time you just call them silly.

Racism is something that mankind has dealt with since the the Tower of Babel (Genesis 11:1-9).  When people began to discover differences, they began to exploit those differences for their own benefit, and to deem other segments of mankind as lower than themselves.  Even today, racism still runs rampant in countries all over our world, with certain classes of people still being considered less than human (check out the Untouchables in India).

What does the Bible have to say about such divisions in humanity?  We have to start with the very beginning, a very good place to start.

If we look back at Genesis, we understand that all people have a common ancestry, a common tie, and all have been created in the Image of God (Imago Dei, Genesis 1:26-27).  As the Old Testament unfolds, God chooses one group of people through whom to speak to the world (The Jewish People), but did not give permission for them or anyone else to look down on others based on race. 

As we move into the New Testament, the death of Jesus on the cross for all of mankind gives all people the opportunity to be made right with God, and re-establishes the complete equality of all mankind in the eyes of God (James 2:1-9; 2 Corinthians 5:14-17; Galatians 3:28; Colossians 3:11).

Things we can do to overcome racism

1. Begin to pray for those that we have trouble loving.  When you pray for someone else's health, well being, and salvation with God, you take the focus off of your differences and begin to see them as a person made in the Image of God.
2. Find ways to actively serve the community that you have trouble loving, be they white, african american, latino, or whatever.  As we serve others and put their needs ahead of our own, we begin to become more like Christ in our attitudes and actions (Philippians 2:3-5).
3. Share the Gospel with everyone.  Nothing will change the world around us and our perspective of it as much as a church filled with people from every class, race, and background.

We must work to overcome racism, from jokes to hate speech to physical violence, and bring the love of Jesus to everyone, everywhere!

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Made for Worship - God created us all to worship, to be connected to and find meaning in Him.

No other gods, only Me.

-Exodus 20:3 (The Message)

IDOL'ATRY, n. [L. idololatria. Gr. idol, and to worship or serve.]

1. The worship of idols, images, or any thing made by hands, or which is not God.

2. Excessive attachment or veneration for any thing, or that which borders on adoration.

So for you and I, idolatry is:

• Putting anyone or anything in your life in the place of God.
• Finding meaning in anything other than God.

God didn't make this a standard for our lives simply because He's some pompous, egotistical God, but because fellowship with Him is what we are made for.  And making someone or something else the most important thing in our lives breaks our relationship with Him and brings us pain and misery. 

Take a look at the woman at the well in John 4.

She had spent her whole life looking for meaning in relationships with men, and all of them had failed.  She was so distraught at her failure to find meaning, that she had actually given up on marriage and had chosen to live a life as a social reject and accept herself as meaningless and without purpose (That's why she was coming to the well alone in the heat of the day, she was a social reject who couldn't come at the same time as the other women). 

Jesus offered her LIVING WATER.  This was an opportunity to feel alive, have a purpose, to have meaning in her life.  All she needed to do was abandon her idol of relationships and trust in Jesus.

Jesus offers us LIVNG WATER still today.  But first we must be willing to give up our idols.  Those things that we chase after to give our lives meaning and purpose. Those things that replace God as first in our lives.

What is your Idol?  Sports, Relationships, Church, Grades, Money, Success, Things

God is asking you to step out of the shadows of your idol and back into the light of fellowship with Him.  Make the choice today.

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